I came across a great article entitled, Does your spouse know you are for him/her? Let me share a list of questions we as wives should be asking ourselves of how we are making the gospel come alive in our marriages from RickThomas.net.
“The two greatest things that could ever happen to a man is to live in the overflowing awareness of God’s pleasure and to experience his wife’s undeniable affection. One of the most practical ways a wife could live out the Gospel is to practically give it out to her husband.”
20 questions to make the Gospel come alive in your marriage
Paul gives us a way to think about God’s love for us. He does not just say, “God loves you,” he proves it–he shows us. With that in mind, here are some thoughts that will aid you as you think about the Gospel and its practical out-workings toward your husband.
- Are you aware of the power you have over your husband?
- Do you love your husband?
- Do you respect your husband?
- Are you quick, ready, and willing to forgive your husband?
- Are you quick, ready, and willing to ask him to forgive you?
- Do you defer to him, which is one way you can help him to be a better leader?
- What is your first thought when you think about your husband? Is it a synonym of love?
- Would you be characterized as a nag or an encourager? (This question is talking about your regular patterns, not any one episode. We all have episodes of sin.)
- Do you talk negatively about him to others? Is he aware of this?
- How would other people describe your attitude and affection for your husband?
- Will you ask them–those people who will tell you the truth?
- Are you actively loving him, even though he does not deserve your love all the time?
- Do you wait to love him after he changes, after he meets your preferences and expectations? (Think Gospel here: How does God treat you? Does He love you after you change or does He love you even when you’re not changing?)
- Do you punish your husband when he does not meet your expectations? If so, how do you do it? Anger? Silent treatment? Withhold sex?
- How are you humbly leading your husband by your Gospel-motivated example? (I’m talking about leading him by not being out front.)
- Has your behavior assisted in pushing your husband toward other people or things? If so, how so?
- Will you write out the answers to these questions and begin making a plan for repentance, if you need to repent of anything?
- Will you begin thanking God if He has brought sinful attitudes and behaviors to light?
- Will you talk to your husband about these things?
- Will you ask your husband if he is assured you are for him and then ask him to give you specific examples for why he answered the way he did?
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