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There Are No Perfect Families

by Marci Ferrell
Christian Living Encouragement Motherhood

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Do you ever look around at the families in your church and assume they have it all together?  That their lives must be carefree and they have these perfect obedient children, problem-free marriages and every day goes just as planned?   @mferrell
 
Do you ever look around at the families in your church and assume they have it all together?  That their lives must be carefree and they have these perfect obedient children, problem-free marriages and every day goes just as planned?  @mferrell

Do you ever look around at the families in your church and assume they have it all together?  That their lives must be carefree and they have these perfect obedient children, problem-free marriages and every day goes just as planned?  

Do you ever look around at the families in your church and assume they have it all together?  That their lives must be carefree and they have these perfect obedient children, problem-free marriages and every day goes just as planned?   Click to Tweet

We know deep down this isn’t true because we live in a fallen world.  Overcoming sin in our lives is a battle we will be dealing with until the Lord calls us home.  Sin infects every home – sin infects every Christian home.  We all battle sinful attitudes, pride, selfishness, envy, discontentment, rudeness, disobedience, unloving actions and attitudes, rebellious hearts, comparison, and the list can go on.

If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. ~ 1 John 1:8


Let me turn the table a moment- do you think your family is the perfect family in your church?  Do you compare your family to others and think, “I’m thankful we don’t have the issues that family has.” Hmmm – there’s a statement with a familiar ring to it:

“Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector.  The Pharisee, standing by himself, prayed thus: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector.  I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I get.’  But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, ‘God, be merciful to me, a sinner!’  I tell you, this man went down to his house justified, rather than the other. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted.”Luke 18:10-14

 

The Reality

We live in a fallen world, and each family in your church has their own battles they are dealing with.  It is a battle (Ephesians 6:10-20) but one we are not left to ourselves if we are in Christ.  We have a heavenly Father who never leaves us or forsakes us.  He is with us always and has given us the truth of His Word and the Holy Spirit to overcome sin.  God has equipped us not to sin and to make choices that would honor and bring glory to His name.

We, as His children, don’t always make those choices and we sin.  The war against sin in our homes continues until the Lord calls us all home.  When you’re in a war, you have to fight and do battle against the enemy.  Sin is our enemy, and it has the power to tear apart families and churches if we let it.  

Related Post: Podcast EP 42 – Some Titus 2 Encouragement Along the Way

Fighting the Good Fight

Unfortunately, it is not as easy as offering a three-step plan for overcoming sin in your family.  What I can point you to are the truths of God’s Word:

Walk in the Spirit – Galatians 5:16-25

Be Filled with the Spirit – Ephesians 5:18-21

Be Equipped – 2 Timothy 3:16-17

Pray – Ephesians 6:18

Fellowship with Other Believers – Hebrews 10:24-25

Forgive Others – Matthew 6:15

Be Real – Confess Your Sins to One Another – James 5:16

Offering Grace To Others

Whether in our immediate families or our church families, we need to be continually offering grace to one another.  I am not saying here to overlook sin, but not every sin needs to be pointed out.  Love covers a multitude of sins, and we need to have merciful and forgiving spirits to those that sin against us.  Many times we are quick to judge someone, and isn’t it wonderfully convicting when we find ourselves with the same sinful attitude or action that we just judged someone else for.  That is a moment to give thanks in – we all need to be brought low because we tend to think too highly of ourselves. (Romans 12:3, 1 Peter 4:8)

Get to know the families in your church and see how you can be praying for them.  Be honest with struggles in your own family as there are probably others who are dealing with similar situations, and you can be an encouragement to each other.  We are too concerned with what others may think, instead of seeing other believers as soldiers who are fighting the good fight of the faith alongside us.  Dear Christians – we are on the same team.

Our Responsibility

The Lord Jesus Christ has called me to fight the good fight. I need to be in the Word and on my knees to overcome the sinful battles I face on a day to day basis within my home, and among those, I am in contact with outside the walls of my home.

My prayer is that we would be mindful of our attitudes, actions, and responses to others.  As  Christians, we are called to be steadfast and immovable, abounding in the work of the Lord (1 Corinthians 15:58). As wives, we are called to love our husbands and children, be keepers at home, self-controlled and submissive to our husbands (Titus 2:4-5).  As parents, we are called to disciple and instruct our children in the ways of the Lord (Ephesians 6:4).

We can’t control the attitudes and actions of others towards us, but we are responsible for the way we treat and respond to others.

“The most important truth to remember is we can’t do any of this on our own.  We need the Holy Spirit to open up the truths of the gospel within our hearts.  This is true for every moment of our lives.  Continue to ask the Holy Spirit to open your eyes and make the gospel alive to you again.”  ~ The Importance of the Gospel in the Life of A Believer

Our families are a beautiful way the Lord continues to sanctify us and mold us more and more into the image of His Son.

“Only those who are truly aware of their sin can truly cherish grace.” ~C. J. Mahaney

Related Links:

Accidental Pharisees

The Importance of the Gospel in the Life of a Believer

 
 
 
 
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Related posts:

  1. EP 32: Preparing Our Families for Sunday Morning Worship
  2. Preparing Our Families for Sunday Morning Worship
  3. EP 60: Gently Correcting Our Children
  4. She Opens Her Mouth With Wisdom


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Comments

  1. Brenda says

    at

    Amen! Thank you for such a encouraging, convicting post! Great Truths to start my Monday off with. Have a blessed day!

    • Marci Ferrell says

      at

      Thank you for stopping by Brenda and for your kind words xo

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Marci Ferrell
It is better to get wisdom than gold. Gold is anot It is better to get wisdom than gold. Gold is another’s, wisdom is our own; gold is for the body and time, wisdom for the soul and eternity.⁣
~ Matthew Henry⁣
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Read Seeking Whatever is Good at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
Whether you're running errands, doing household ch Whether you're running errands, doing household chores, or sipping your coffee, you can do it in style, reminding yourself and others you are a Thankful Homemaker 🥰⁣
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Shop TH Gear at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image).
What do you think of when you hear the word discer What do you think of when you hear the word discernment? The dictionary defines it as making a distinction between good and evil and truth and falsehood. As believers, we all desire to be discerning and wise in our choices. As we mature and grow in our knowledge of the scriptures, the hope is we will use that information to make choices in line with God's will.⁣
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We become discerning people by not just knowing what to think but how to think. Being spiritually discerning is an ability to see the world the way God does. This comes about as we grow and mature spiritually into the likeness of Christ. It is about seeing “All That's Good.”⁣
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Read Seeking Whatever is Good at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
“Waiting exposes our idols and throws a wrench i “Waiting exposes our idols and throws a wrench into our coping mechanisms. It brings us to the end of what we can control and forces us to cry out to God. God doesn’t waste our waiting. He uses it to conform us to the image of his Son.”⁣
~ Betsy Childs Howard⁣
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Listen in to EP 23: Seasons of Waiting at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
As I’m sharing this episode, I’m finding mysel As I’m sharing this episode, I’m finding myself in a waiting room on the Lord, and it’s been a long one, and I don’t see an end near.  It has reminded me that when I gave myself to Him, I gave up my “right” to be in charge. The reality is we never were in charge anyway; we just came to that understanding when the Lord opened our eyes to His sovereign control over our lives.⁣
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Even though it is a truth I know or we know, how many times do we want to think that somehow we can effect change in our life situations?⁣
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Waiting is hard because there is no guarantee that my waiting will end in this lifetime. One thing I have learned – my waiting has deepened my trust in the Lord and has helped me to develop patience, perseverance, and endurance.⁣
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It’s also given me different eyes to see with compassion others who are in a season of waiting.⁣
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Listen in to EP 23 Seasons of Waiting at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
Six questions I have written in my Bible that have Six questions I have written in my Bible that have been a help to me over the years may be a help to you, too, to be prayerful and slow to speak. These are helpful questions not just in our friendships but in our marriages and with our children, and truly any of our relationships:⁣
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1. Is this the time to say this?⁣
2. Am I the person to say this?⁣
3. Is it necessary?⁣
4. Is it true?⁣
5. Is it kind?⁣
6. Do I need to say this?⁣
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Listen in to EP 140: Threats to Biblical Friendship at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
We all know that fostering true biblical friendshi We all know that fostering true biblical friendship isn’t easy – it takes work. Jesus told us in John 16:33 that we’re going to have trouble in this world, and trouble does touch all our lives in various areas, but this includes our friendships too.⁣
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We’ll be hurt; we’ll be the ones hurting others; selfishness is a battle; jealousy and envy raise their ugly heads; we have our fears and insecurities, failed expectations, the damage our tongues do to one another, not appropriating the gospel and these all come from hearts that are still battling sin. ⁣
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So when these threats to our friendship with one another in Christ come up, it shouldn’t surprise us that we have these issues, but what we need to keep at the forefront of our minds is how we respond and deal with them when they do come up. ⁣
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I want to walk us through some of these threats, and this list I’m working with isn’t exhaustive – there are many more threats than what I am addressing today – but these are areas that stood out to me that have been a battle within some of my friendships over the years. Sadly, it is often the sin I’m battling in my heart, and I need to get my thinking, attitudes, and actions lined up with God’s Word.⁣
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Listen to EP 140 Threats to Biblical Friendship at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
May we be women who are willing to return to the a May we be women who are willing to return to the authority of God’s Word, embrace God’s priorities for our lives and homes, and live out the beauty and wonder of womanhood as God created it to be.⁣
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Read more at The History of Modern Feminism at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
Women will never find fulfillment and satisfaction Women will never find fulfillment and satisfaction by trying to be "like" men and shedding their uniqueness as a female.  They will only find satisfaction in Christ.⁣
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Come read The History of Modern Feminism at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
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