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Are You For Your Husband?

by Marci Ferrell
Marriage Respect

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20 questions to make the Gospel come alive in your marriage

I came across a great article entitled,  Does your spouse know you are for him/her?  Let me share a list of questions we as wives should be asking ourselves of how we are making the gospel come alive in our marriages from RickThomas.net. 

“The two greatest things that could ever happen to a man is to live in the overflowing awareness of God’s pleasure and to experience his wife’s undeniable affection. One of the most practical ways a wife could live out the Gospel is to practically give it out to her husband.”
~Rick Thomas


20 questions to make the Gospel come alive in your marriage

Paul gives us a way to think about God’s love for us. He does not just say, “God loves you,” he proves it–he shows us. With that in mind, here are some thoughts that will aid you as you think about the Gospel and its practical out-workings toward your husband.

  1. Are you aware of the power you have over your husband?
  2. Do you love your husband?
  3. Do you respect your husband?
  4. Are you quick, ready, and willing to forgive your husband?
  5. Are you quick, ready, and willing to ask him to forgive you?
  6. Do you defer to him, which is one way you can help him to be a better leader?
  7. What is your first thought when you think about your husband? Is it a synonym of love?
  8. Would you be characterized as a nag or an encourager? (This question is talking about your regular patterns, not any one episode. We all have episodes of sin.)
  9. Do you talk negatively about him to others? Is he aware of this?
  10. How would other people describe your attitude and affection for your husband?
  11. Will you ask them–those people who will tell you the truth?
  12. Are you actively loving him, even though he does not deserve your love all the time?
  13. Do you wait to love him after he changes, after he meets your preferences and expectations? (Think Gospel here: How does God treat you? Does He love you after you change or does He love you even when you’re not changing?)
  14. Do you punish your husband when he does not meet your expectations? If so, how do you do it? Anger? Silent treatment? Withhold sex?
  15. How are you humbly leading your husband by your Gospel-motivated example? (I’m talking about leading him by not being out front.)
  16. Has your behavior assisted in pushing your husband toward other people or things? If so, how so?
  17. Will you write out the answers to these questions and begin making a plan for repentance, if you need to repent of anything?
  18. Will you begin thanking God if He has brought sinful attitudes and behaviors to light?
  19. Will you talk to your husband about these things?
  20. Will you ask your husband if he is assured you are for him and then ask him to give you specific examples for why he answered the way he did?
~Above Questions Taken from RickThomas.net  – You can read the entire article here.  (Please note I changed the word spouse where Rick had it to husband since my audience is women.)

 

Related Helpful Links:

Loving our Husbands

Who pays for your spouse’s sin: Christ or your spouse?

Drive By Marriage

 

Related posts:

  1. Addressing Our Husband’s Sin
  2. Are You Kind to Your Husband?
  3. The Impact of Encouraging Your Husband
  4. How Respectful Are You To Your Husband?


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Comments

  1. Keri at Growing in His Glory says

    at

    This post is what I needed to read this morning. I’m “battling” with my husband when we need to be working together. I’m not respecting him like I should and it’s evident in the way he’s responding to me. I see it, yet in my pride, I won’t say “I’m sorry” and mean it. Thank you for bringing my sin to light.

    Blessings to you,

  2. Alison Wood says

    at

    Great list. My husband time adn time tells me the most important thing I can do in our marriage is respect him. If we respect our husbands, many of the other problems go away. If we respect him we won’t belittle or talk about him behind his back. But, first and foremost, we are able to be the wife he needs if we are walking with the Lord. I am pinning this list:)
    Visiting from Pint-sized Treasures

  3. Rosann says

    at

    Love this list! These questions are marriage saving and important to ask ourselves. It’s not always his fault when things go awry. Sometimes we desperately need to look hard in the mirror.

  4. Our Neck of the Woods says

    at

    What a great post! I really enjoyed this. Recently we had a series at church on marriage and we touched on a lot of the same topics you have here. It’s a great reminder!

  5. A Proverbs 31 Wife says

    at

    I love this! Definitely something we all need to work very hard on.
    I would love for you to link this up at Matrimonial Mondays 🙂
    http://aproverbs31wife.com/matrimonial-monday-6/

  6. Judith says

    at

    The topics you select to blog about are continually an encouragement to me. For some reason, I don’t often find your comment button, so there are many more that I have wanted to thank you for besides this post.

  7. Angie Salinas-Benjamin says

    at

    @Womanhood With Purpose
    Beautiful, Thanks for sharing this powerful article!

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Marci Ferrell
Patience is our ability, under the control of the Patience is our ability, under the control of the Spirit, to persevere and endure in times of suffering or hardship.⁣⁣
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Come listen in (or read) EP 118: Cultivating Patience with One Another at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
By affliction, Christ . . .⁣⁣ shows us our em By affliction, Christ . . .⁣⁣
 shows us our emptiness and weakness,⁣⁣
 draws us to the throne of grace,⁣⁣
 purifies our affections,⁣⁣
 weans us from the world,⁣⁣
 and makes us long for Heaven.⁣⁣
~ J.C. Ryle⁣
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Read more of Trusting God in Your Trials at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
I know we can all relate to self-pity as women, wi I know we can all relate to self-pity as women, wives, and mothers.  How many times do we focus on our needs that aren’t met?  Unfair situations or circumstances?  Self-pity is a selfish tendency that takes our eyes off Christ and puts them on ourselves. ⁣⁣
⁣⁣
We forget that “God works all things together for good to those who love Him and are called according to His purpose.” Are we able to give God “thanks in all things”?⁣⁣
⁣⁣
Come listen in to EP 105: Practical Steps to Overcome Self Pity at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)⁣
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#rootedinChrist #rootedintheword #christian #christianity #thankfulhomemaker #bedeeplyrooted  #christianblogger  #christians #treasurechrist #joyinchrist #inchristalone #deeplyrooted #martynlloydjones #selfpity
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Weekly Menu Planning Free PDF is at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image).
"God's written Word, the Bible, is God's greatest "God's written Word, the Bible, is God's greatest earthly gift to his people, second only to the living Word, Jesus. And because the living Word perfectly lived out the written Word, we are blessed beyond measure. Jesus fulfilled every precept found in Psalm 119, keeping the principles and commandments of this psalm, and he did so on our behalf.⁣
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Our failure to live wholeheartedly is covered by Jesus, who lived it perfectly for us. Ultimately, he is Psalm 119 in human form, the Word became flesh and dwelt among us (John 1:14)."⁣
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~ Taken from Sing a New Song: A Woman's Guide to the Psalms by Lydia Brownback⁣
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With my whole heart I seek you;⁣
let me not wander from your commandments!⁣
I have stored up your word in my heart,⁣
that I might not sin against you.⁣
~ Psalm 119:10-11
Accept the cost of good deeds in time, thought, an Accept the cost of good deeds in time, thought, and effort. But remember that opportunities for doing good are not interruptions in God’s plan for us, but part of that plan. We always have time to do what God wants us to do.⁣
~ Jerry Bridges, The Practice of Godliness⁣
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I’m sharing a walkthrough of various tools and s I’m sharing a walkthrough of various tools and systems that help me to get things done. It’s a practical episode, and I hope to encourage you, if nothing else, to take a look at how your days are going and ask yourself some simple questions like:⁣
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What is working and what is not working?⁣
Where do I find myself wasting time?⁣
Where can I make better use of my time?⁣
Can I simplify my days or various tasks or automate them?⁣
⁣
These are just a few questions to ponder, and there are many more you can ask, but the main one is to seek the Lord and ask him, are you a good steward of your time? Is your desire to honor Him amid your days and in how you spend your time?⁣
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Many more than ten systems or tools help me manage my days, but these items top my list. I’ve shared more in detail on some of these in past blog posts or podcast episodes, but I wanted to put together an episode that walked through how I use each one.⁣
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An episode like this one is more helpful to me than you because it helps me to think through my days and systems and tools and determine what is working for me and what isn’t.⁣
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Listen to 10 Things Helping Me Manage My Days as a Homemaker at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image).
Who doesn’t want to save money, time, their sani Who doesn’t want to save money, time, their sanity, reduce stress, eat healthy and avoid the dreaded question, “What’s for dinner?” It sounds great, right, and we’d all love to do it, but how do we get there?⁣
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Though gradually, though no one remembers exactly Though gradually, though no one remembers exactly how it happened, the unthinkable becomes tolerable. And then acceptable. And then legal. And then applaudable.⁣
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