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Kindness in Our Homes

by Marci Ferrell
Loving Our Children Loving Our Husbands Marriage Motherhood

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How easy is it to put on a good face when we are around others and treat strangers with more kindness than we do those within our own family. @mferrell
 
Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, 
Colossians 3:12


We spend the most time every day with those in our households.  These are the ones most dear to us but also the ones we can take for granted. Do we show them how much we love them, appreciate them and that we know they are a blessing from God?

How easy is it to put on a good face when we are around others and treat strangers with more kindness than we do those within our own family. 


We have all heard familiarity breeds contempt, and with our families, we know all the good and bad about each other.  How many times do we magnify their weaknesses and forget to take the log out of our own eye?  


In Colossians 3:12-14 we are told to “put on kindness.”  This has to be from the heart, and as moms, we set the tone of our homes by our responses and reactions to others.   There may be times when you do not feel like responding kindly, but I encourage you to pray before you respond. Responding kindly even when you do not feel like it is better than responding unkindly.  


We are told in Proverbs 14:1 that a wise woman builds up her home but a foolish one tears it down with her own hands.  Responding unkindly to others in your home is taking the action of tearing down your own home.  We cannot use excuses or blame others for our unkind responses.  


Pray and spend time with the Lord in His Word – we cannot do this in our own strength.  God is always there to help us. Spend time with Him and prepare yourself for those stressful times.  


Make sure you are getting adequate sleep, eating well and exercising.  Plan in the areas you know that you are apt to respond unkindly.  I always think of Sunday mornings heading to church as a difficult time for families.  Make sure you spend the evening before planning your Sunday morning, so you are patient and kind with your family.


What are some ways we can put on kindness to our families?


  • Show them lots of affection – appropriate hugs and kisses and lots of “I love you’s” should be going on regularly in our homes.  
  • Use your manners when you speak to your children.
  • Smile – A LOT!!
  • Greet them when they come home and say goodbye before they leave the house.  
  • Take time to make them feel special by making favorite meals or desserts.  Picking up little gifts or writing them special notes.
  • Take time to Romance Your Husband.
  • Help them to develop hearts that are compassionate by reaching out as a family to those in need.  Volunteer with them, involve them in hospitality within your home, help families in need in your church and community.
  • Discipline with love and firmness.  Our children must learn to submit to our authority it is commanded in scripture that they honor and obey their parents.  We are to love them and lead them as Christ does to us – He is our example.  Our most powerful tool of discipline with our children the Lord has given us is love.  
  • Speak well of your family to others.
  • Enjoy special traditions with each other – family movie & game nights, special dinners, etc.  
  • Do not speak unkindly about others.
  • Evangelize to your family and others – the most loving thing we can do is share the Gospel with the lost.  
  • Be consistent – behave at home as you do in public. 
We need to develop a kind disposition, to be sensitive to others and desire their happiness.  But sensitivity alone is not enough:  the grace of goodness impels us to take action to meet those needs.
~ Jerry Bridges ~
 
Kindness is love in action.
~ Author Unknown ~


Related Resources:

Podcast Episode 5: Putting on Kindness in Our Homes
The Law of Kindness by Mary Beeke

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Related posts:

  1. EP 5: Putting on Kindness in Our Homes
  2. EP 18: Putting on an Attitude of Love in Our Homes
  3. Modern Day Examples of Titus 2 Women
  4. Helping the Younger Women to be Keepers of their Homes


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« EP 17: Cherishing Your Husband
EP 18: Putting on an Attitude of Love in Our Homes »

Comments

  1. Carrie says

    at

    Wonderful post— I definitely needed this today. What a great reminder that we should use our manners when we interact with our children, instead of just teaching them to use theirs. That’s easy to forget with very little ones.

  2. Audra Marie says

    at

    True words of wisdom, and I love the list. Great post. 🙂

  3. Jenifer Harrod says

    at

    I needed this today! I am trying my best to have more kindness in our days:)

  4. Lisa says

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    I needed this today, Marci. Thank you!
    Many blessings,
    Lisa

  5. Bambi says

    at

    Such a great list. And truth-filled words. I think of the Proverbs 31 woman…kindness always on her tongue. How short I fall!

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Marci Ferrell
Patience is our ability, under the control of the Patience is our ability, under the control of the Spirit, to persevere and endure in times of suffering or hardship.⁣⁣
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Come listen in (or read) EP 118: Cultivating Patience with One Another at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
By affliction, Christ . . .⁣⁣ shows us our em By affliction, Christ . . .⁣⁣
 shows us our emptiness and weakness,⁣⁣
 draws us to the throne of grace,⁣⁣
 purifies our affections,⁣⁣
 weans us from the world,⁣⁣
 and makes us long for Heaven.⁣⁣
~ J.C. Ryle⁣
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Read more of Trusting God in Your Trials at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
I know we can all relate to self-pity as women, wi I know we can all relate to self-pity as women, wives, and mothers.  How many times do we focus on our needs that aren’t met?  Unfair situations or circumstances?  Self-pity is a selfish tendency that takes our eyes off Christ and puts them on ourselves. ⁣⁣
⁣⁣
We forget that “God works all things together for good to those who love Him and are called according to His purpose.” Are we able to give God “thanks in all things”?⁣⁣
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Come listen in to EP 105: Practical Steps to Overcome Self Pity at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)⁣
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#rootedinChrist #rootedintheword #christian #christianity #thankfulhomemaker #bedeeplyrooted  #christianblogger  #christians #treasurechrist #joyinchrist #inchristalone #deeplyrooted #martynlloydjones #selfpity
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Weekly Menu Planning Free PDF is at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image).
"God's written Word, the Bible, is God's greatest "God's written Word, the Bible, is God's greatest earthly gift to his people, second only to the living Word, Jesus. And because the living Word perfectly lived out the written Word, we are blessed beyond measure. Jesus fulfilled every precept found in Psalm 119, keeping the principles and commandments of this psalm, and he did so on our behalf.⁣
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Our failure to live wholeheartedly is covered by Jesus, who lived it perfectly for us. Ultimately, he is Psalm 119 in human form, the Word became flesh and dwelt among us (John 1:14)."⁣
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~ Taken from Sing a New Song: A Woman's Guide to the Psalms by Lydia Brownback⁣
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With my whole heart I seek you;⁣
let me not wander from your commandments!⁣
I have stored up your word in my heart,⁣
that I might not sin against you.⁣
~ Psalm 119:10-11
Accept the cost of good deeds in time, thought, an Accept the cost of good deeds in time, thought, and effort. But remember that opportunities for doing good are not interruptions in God’s plan for us, but part of that plan. We always have time to do what God wants us to do.⁣
~ Jerry Bridges, The Practice of Godliness⁣
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Listen in to 10 Things Helping Me to Manage My Days as a Homemaker at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image).
I’m sharing a walkthrough of various tools and s I’m sharing a walkthrough of various tools and systems that help me to get things done. It’s a practical episode, and I hope to encourage you, if nothing else, to take a look at how your days are going and ask yourself some simple questions like:⁣
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What is working and what is not working?⁣
Where do I find myself wasting time?⁣
Where can I make better use of my time?⁣
Can I simplify my days or various tasks or automate them?⁣
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These are just a few questions to ponder, and there are many more you can ask, but the main one is to seek the Lord and ask him, are you a good steward of your time? Is your desire to honor Him amid your days and in how you spend your time?⁣
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Many more than ten systems or tools help me manage my days, but these items top my list. I’ve shared more in detail on some of these in past blog posts or podcast episodes, but I wanted to put together an episode that walked through how I use each one.⁣
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An episode like this one is more helpful to me than you because it helps me to think through my days and systems and tools and determine what is working for me and what isn’t.⁣
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Listen to 10 Things Helping Me Manage My Days as a Homemaker at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image).
Who doesn’t want to save money, time, their sani Who doesn’t want to save money, time, their sanity, reduce stress, eat healthy and avoid the dreaded question, “What’s for dinner?” It sounds great, right, and we’d all love to do it, but how do we get there?⁣
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Though gradually, though no one remembers exactly Though gradually, though no one remembers exactly how it happened, the unthinkable becomes tolerable. And then acceptable. And then legal. And then applaudable.⁣
~ Joni Eareckson Tada⁣
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