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Teaching the Younger Women

by Marci Ferrell
Biblical Womanhood Mentoring Titus 2

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Many years ago when I was just a young girl in school, I remember taking a class called Home Economics.  It went over basic home keeping skills, sewing and cooking. I grew up with a stay-at-home mom, and most of my female family members were stay-at-home moms.  I do not come from a Christian family, but the example was set before me of being a homemaker.
I spent my days as a young girl playing “house” with my dolls, dreaming of growing up, being married, having children and taking care of my own home.
My mother didn't realize the impact her role had on me at that time, as it wasn't so much specifically being taught…as it was caught.  Now remember, this wasn't a Bible believing home, but the role of the older woman teaching the younger woman just happened as part of our day.  My mom and I cleaned house together, cooked, baked, made homemade gifts and did yard work and chores alongside each other. We didn't share the truths of God's Word as to the why, but the part of being a keeper at home and what that entailed were shared with me.
As the years went on and I was in high school, my mom went back into the work force.  Things changed at home.  Home was no longer her priority to keep.  She was tired when she came home, meals were made using more convenient methods, or take out was an option, and she wasn't there to learn alongside.  I didn't realize how much I missed those moments until I was married and had a family of my own.
As I finished high school and continued on to higher education, the role of a home keeper was not looked upon favorably.  You were encouraged to use your skills and gifts to work outside the home and have your own career.  I bought into the lie.
After my husband and I were married, I continued working even after having our first child.  Mind you, we were not believers at this time, but my heart was torn every time I had to leave my daughter to go to work.  I am so thankful that it took only one year instead of twenty to draw my heart back home.  We both decided it was better for me to be home ,and we made adjustments to our budget to live on one income.  As I look back now, I give thanks to the Lord for His goodness in not letting me continue on this path.
As our eyes were opened to the gospel of Jesus Christ, He began revealing truths to us of the roles of men and women.  My first introduction to the Titus 2 passage was through a favorite book I read yearly called Feminine Appeal by Carolyn Mahaney.
As I read through this book, I wondered, why isn't this being taught in the church?  None of the older women talked to me about loving my husband and children, what it meant to be a keeper at home, how to be kind, self controlled, submissive to my husband, and pure so that the word of God would not be reviled. The passage of Titus 2:3-5 never even came up in any of our women's studies.

Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.
Titus 2:3-5

Fast forward several years and we are now in a body of believers where this verse is lived out among the women with their daughters as well as the older women to the younger women in the church.

Older women should teach younger women the skills and disciplines needed to have a successful home and marriage. Experienced wives and mothers will find their greatest avenue of ministry in teaching younger wives what they need to know to be effective wives, mothers, and homemakers.
John MacArthur

God's Word is the ultimate education for me as a wife and mother.  Home economics can teach me the skills and basics, but it doesn't teach me the why.  Public education led me away from the role God called me to into a role that told me in order to make something of myself I needed to get out in the work force and have a career.  God's Word clearly tells me that my priority must be home.  Now I understand it doesn't forbid working outside the home or earning an income through a home business, but we must always come back to the question:

Is the priority of my family being compromised in any way by my work or outside activities?
The Heart of Simplicty

Our roles as women are not easy, and they can seem to be mundane at times if we are not taught the reason behind why we do what we do. When we fulfill the role God has called us to as a wife and mother we protect our families from dishonoring God and His Word (Titus 2:5).  Our purpose in all we do is to glorify God (1 Corinthians 10:31).  God uses our role as women and the difficulties and trials we may entail, to grow us more and more into the likeness of His Son (James 1:2-4). We are the dominant influence in our homes, our husbands are the leaders, but we have been given much power by God on whether we will choose to build up or tear down our homes (Proverbs 14:1).

The Role of the Older Woman

Let me start with a definition of spiritual mothering from Susan Hunt:

When a woman possessing faith and spiritual maturity enters into a nurturing relationship with a younger woman in order to encourage and equip her to live for God’s glory.

How can those of us who are a little further down the road be an encouragement and teach the principles laid out in Titus 2 to the younger women the Lord has placed in our lives?  Our desire should be to help younger women live out godly lives in an ungodly world.
Paul gave seven specific instructions to the older women to teach the younger woman and he gave the reason why – that the Word of God may not be dishonored – Titus 2:5.

“The Greek work for dishonored is blasphemetai.  It means to “speak of with irreverence, to revile or abuse.  Blasphemetai is a very strong word from which we derive our English word blaspheme.  It is not merely remaining neutral towards God's Word.  It is an affront to God's Word when women violate any of the seven instructions Paul gave to Titus for the younger women.  The older, Titus 2 Woman should influence the younger woman to bear fruit for the Lord an thus honor His Word.”
~Martha Peace, Becoming a Titus 2 Woman

This list below is not exhaustive, but the hope is to get you thinking and living out your role as an older women.  Please share ways you have lived this out with us in the comments so we may be an encouragement to one another:
  • Only through the gospel of Jesus Christ can a self centered young woman turn into a Christ focused woman who desires to live out these biblical principles.  Share the gospel with the young women the Lord has placed in your life.
  • Your daughters in your home are your first priority, but make sure you seek other relationships with younger women who can use guidance and teaching.
  • Work alongside them in the home, and teach as you go.
  • Share spiritual truths, and let them see you handling difficult situations in a God honoring way.
  • It may involve doing an actual book study.  Some great resources to read along with younger women are:  Becoming a Woman Who Pleases God, Lies Women Believe and the Truth that Sets them Free, Feminine Appeal, The Excellent Wife and Spiritual Mothering.
  • You must be intentional about your role in the lives of younger women.
  • Speak the truths of biblical womanhood into their lives.
  • Managing a home is a huge task, and many young women are not prepared for caring for a home.  Help them in practical ways by sharing cleaning and cooking tips.  Showing how you have found shortcuts and better ways to do things.  Do not be offended if they don't take your advice.  They are listening, and they may not see the need for that direction at that moment but will be thankful for the advice in days to come.
  • You are teaching doctrine as you share how to handle  unsaved husbands, disciplining children, disagreements between a husband and wife, relating to in-laws and parents, and any other areas that need some guidance on how they are to be dealt with in a God honoring way.
  • Prepare yourself by being in the Word – the older woman is to be reverent, not a slave to much wine, not a slanderer but they are to teach what is good (Titus 2:3).  Love the Lord with all your heart, soul, mind and strength (Deut. 6:5).
  • Remember it is not a program but a way of life.

The Role of the Younger Woman

As an older woman I want to share a word with you about your hearts my dear young women;  make sure you remain teachable.  I know there is much you know and much us older women can learn from you too, but after being married for over a quarter of a century, caring for a home, raising babies, becoming grandparents, and caring for aging parents, I can assure you we have some guidance and direction that you can learn much from.
Take the time to seek out relationships with older godly women – your mother or mother-in-law being the first one. Spend time in the homes of older women and watch and learn how they respond to their husbands, love their children and keep their homes.  Ask questions and plan the time to learn new skills alongside them. There is much conversation that takes place as you are working together.  Be honest and open to seek help in areas you need guidance.

In Closing

May our lives be an example to the younger women in our lives.  May we be involved in teaching the next generations the truths of God's Word and what that looks like lived out on a day to day basis.  Take time to study God's Word so you are equipped to share with the younger women the Lord has placed in your life.
May our prayer be to ask the Lord to make us into women who are reverent in our behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine so we may teach what is good and train the young women. (Titus 2:3-4)

Related posts:

  1. 10 Simple Mentoring Ideas
  2. Women in the Work World
  3. Helping the Younger Women to be Keepers of their Homes
  4. Modern Day Examples of Titus 2 Women


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Comments

  1. A Godly Homemaker says

    at

    i am so going to the next site- this is such an important subject and i love discussing it or reading about it! thanks!

  2. Alexandra says

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    What we teach our daughters is so important. Alexandra.howard@yahoo.com

  3. Anonymous says

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    Thanks!
    Nancy
    schaeferclan(at)sbcglobal(dot)net

  4. Jills Home Remedies says

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    Great to see you at A Wise Woman Builds Her Home!

  5. Mrs. Sewell says

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    Love your blog! I learned of it from Mrs. Fuentes’ blog. I’ve got it bookmarked now 🙂

    By His Grace,
    Crystal <><

  6. Anonymous says

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    I shared your post today at Visionary Womanhood. So good! So needed. So few to speak about it!

  7. Sarah says

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    Beautiful blog. I can’t agree more. I am trying to model what I wish my mom would have modeled – I was brought up with a very feminist mom and having children or getting married was not what *I* had planned but God had other plans.

  8. Caroline @ The Modest Mom says

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    Thank you for the lovely giveaway! 🙂

  9. Chelsea Wipf says

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    i found you from a wise woman builds her home…so glad i did!

  10. Carrie says

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    Thank you for an encouraging site!!

  11. Rebecca says

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    Blessings to you, Marci! 🙂 I’m commenting from the Wise Woman Builds Her Home Giveaway, but I frequent you space already (though I rarely comment, ha), and regularly link up with your Thankful Homemaker blog hop. Your space and your words are a blessing. Thank you!

    With love,
    Rebecca
    From My Mountain View [dot] com

  12. cooperkelly4 says

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    visiting from wise woman and glad that I did. =0)

  13. Anonymous says

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    So lovely!

  14. Lady Violet says

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    A very nice blog you have here!

  15. Heather Lynn says

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    This helps me immensely to reflect on the influence I am having on my only daughter, and also on the type of wife my sons will chose.

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Marci Ferrell
Think to yourself before you respond to pause and Think to yourself before you respond to pause and pray. Two simple actions that take a moment but can give you wise words that are covered in gentleness, grace, and love.⁣
⁣
Quote from EP 60: Gently Correcting Our Children you can listen in at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
We are called in Ephesians 4:29 to respond with wo We are called in Ephesians 4:29 to respond with words that give grace, encourage, and build up. This includes those hard moments when our kids are sinfully disobedient.⁣
⁣
Listen in to EP 60: Gently Correcting Our Children at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
By affliction, Christ . . .⁣ shows us our empti By affliction, Christ . . .⁣
 shows us our emptiness and weakness,⁣
 draws us to the throne of grace,⁣
 purifies our affections,⁣
 weans us from the world,⁣
 and makes us long for Heaven.⁣
~ J.C Ryle
This simple free eight-page guide is meant to help This simple free eight-page guide is meant to help you think through your summertime schedule for your family. As you walk through it you'll determine what your family loves to do, leave room for spontaneity, and put together a simple daily routine to help your days run a bit smoother. ⁣
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There are some summertime meal planning tips and a printable with ideas to put on your family's bucket list for summer and maybe spark new ones of your own! ⁣
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Come download your free 8-page summertime guide here and get access to our whole library of printables when you do.
Such a good conversation with Dale Partridge from Such a good conversation with Dale Partridge from @relearnhq about his new Gospel Project called MailtheGospel.org. You can get the gospel to anyone anywhere.
So appreciate @reagantrose (I do recommend you fol So appreciate @reagantrose (I do recommend you follow friends if you don’t yet!)- link to the podcast episode we talked about Homemaking to the Glory of God in my profile @thankfulhomemaker 

Repost from @reagantrose 
Godliness > Your Plans⁠
The Church is not a gallery for the exhibition of The Church is not a gallery for the exhibition of eminent Christians, but a school for the education of imperfect ones.⁣
~ Henry Ward Beecher⁣
⁣
Come listen to EP 32: Preparing Our Families for Sunday Morning Worship at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
How many times does Sunday morning roll around and How many times does Sunday morning roll around and you find your heart in a state of chaos instead of calm to worship the Lord?  How many Sundays do you arrive at church and realize you haven’t taken the time all week to pray for your pastor or your church family? ⁣
⁣
I want to share with you some simple steps we can take to prepare our hearts and the hearts of our families for Sunday morning worship to the Lord. ⁣
⁣
The hope today is to get you to understand the purpose and the mission of the local church and then to move on toward how we can proceed with some simple steps to prepare our hearts and the hearts of our families for Sunday morning worship to the Lord.⁣
⁣
Come listen to EP 32: Preparing Our Families for Sunday Morning Worship at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
"Home is the true wife's kingdom. ⁣ ⁣ Very lar "Home is the true wife's kingdom. ⁣
⁣
Very largely does the wife hold in her ⁣
hands, as a sacred trust, the happiness ⁣
and the highest good of the hearts that ⁣
nestle there. In the last analysis, home ⁣
happiness depends on the wife. ⁣
⁣
Her spirit gives the home its atmosphere. ⁣
⁣
Her hands fashion its beauty. ⁣
⁣
Her heart makes its love. ⁣
⁣
And the end is so worthy, so noble, so divine, ⁣
that no woman who has been called to be a wife, ⁣
and has listened to the call, should consider any⁣
price too great to pay, to be . . .⁣
 the light,⁣
 the joy,⁣
 the blessing,⁣
 the inspiration, ⁣
of a home. ⁣
⁣
The woman who makes a sweet, beautiful home, ⁣
filling it with love and prayer and purity, is doing ⁣
something better than anything else her hands ⁣
could find to do beneath the skies.⁣
⁣
A true mother is one of the holiest secrets of ⁣
home happiness. God sends many beautiful things ⁣
to this world, many noble gifts; but no blessing is ⁣
richer than that which He bestows in a mother who ⁣
has learned love's lessons well, and has realized ⁣
something of the meaning of her sacred calling."⁣
⁣
~ J. R. Miller, "Secrets of Happy Home Life"
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