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Podcast Ep 40: Marriage Series #7 – Sexual Intimacy in Marriage

by Marci Ferrell
Communication in Marriage Loving Our Husbands Marriage Marriage Series Podcast Sexual Intimacy

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Sex is a beautiful gift from God. As Christian’s we have God’s permission to enjoy sex within our marriages – God invented it. @mferrell

Sex is a beautiful gift from God. As Christian’s we have God’s permission to enjoy sex within our marriages – God invented it. We can learn not just to enjoy it but delight in intimacy with our husbands

Sex is a beautiful gift from God. As Christian’s we have God’s permission to enjoy sex within our marriages – God invented it. We can learn not just to enjoy it but delight in intimacy with our husbands Click to Tweet

Martha Peace shares:

The physical union of husband and wife is designed by God to meet God-given desire for companionship, to protect the husband and wife from temptation, and for the mutual giving and receiving of great pleasure and joy between the husband and wife. Companionship is strengthened by the private, intimate, physical bond of a married couple. 

Even as Christians we can too easily let the world or other voices in the church give us our view of sex when it has to come from God’s Word. God’s Word is sufficient in all ways and especially and even in our sexual relationship with our husband.

Show Notes:

“As a matter of fact, the sex relationship in marriage receives such emphasis in the Scriptures that we begin to see it was meant not only to be a wonderful, continuing experience for the husband and wife, but it was also intended to show us something even more wonderful about God and His relationship with us. Ephesians 5:31-32 spells it out: “For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Thus properly and lovingly executed and a mutually satisfying sexual union is God’s way of demonstrating to us a great spiritual truth. It speaks to us of the greatest love story ever told —of how Jesus Christ gave Himself for us and is intimately involved with and loves the church (those who believe in Him). In this framework, the sexual relationship between two growing Christians can be intimate fellowship as well as delight.” ~ Ed Wheat, Intended for Pleasure: Sex Technique and Sexual Fulfillment in Christian Marriage

Linda Dillow and Lorraine Pintus in their book Intimate Issues: 21 Questions Christan Women Ask About Sex share in the opening chapter in their book discuss six ways how we are to open our eyes, ears, and hearts to God’s voice on why He created sex:

  1. We know God created the gift of sex for procreation.
  2. Sex is for the gift of intimate oneness
  3. The Gift of Sex is for Intimate Knowledge
  4. God gives us the gift of sex for pleasure
  5. Sex is a Gift from God against temptation
  6. Sex is God’s Gift to Provide Comfort to One Another

“For in touching a person of the opposite sex in the most secret place of his or her body, with one’s own most private part, there is something that reaches beyond touch, that gets behind the flesh itself to the place where it connects with spirit, to the place where incarnation happens.”  ~ Mike Mason, The Mystery of Marriage

“The reason there is so much misery in marriage is not that husbands and wives seek their own pleasure, but that they do not seek it in the pleasure of their spouses.”  ~ John Piper

'The reason there is so much misery in marriage is not that husbands and wives seek their own pleasure, but that they do not seek it in the pleasure of their spouses.' ~ John Piper Click to Tweet

“The Song of Solomon expands on the ancient marriage instructions of Genesis 2:24, thus providing spiritual music for a lifetime of marital harmony. It is given by God to demonstrate His intention for romance and loveliness of marriage, the most precious of human relations and the grace of life.”~John MacArthur

“A young woman came to us and asked, “I’ve had sex with four different men. Now that I’ve gone through the cleansing steps and God has forgiven me for my past, is it possible for me to become a virgin again?” The word “virgin” means “pure.” Even after a woman has yielded her virginity, she can become pure in her sexual thoughts and attitude, in her dress and demeanor, and how she relates to men. The blood of Christ can wash us clean and make our sins white as snow. Such a woman can become a virgin in every way but technically.” ~ Linda Dillow, Intimate Issues

“When a man is in love and turned on by his wife, he is also totally entranced by the feminine beauty of her body, regardless of where the media would rank it on a scale of one to ten. When he is in love with his wife, he experiences the perfection of her body for him.” ~John Gray

“to be sexy is to be aware of your body as an instrument of playfulness and delight, to be able to communicate this awareness to your husband and give him the gift of your body for pleasure, delight, variety, and playfulness.” ~Andrew Greely

“When you begin to see the balance between accepting the way God made you and being responsible for your body, you can become free to be the sensuous and exciting lover God desires you to be, free to concentrate on giving and receiving pleasure rather than on what you look like.”  ~Linda Dillow

“The greatest sexual fulfillment comes gradually over the long haul in a marriage, as a couple learns to talk about anything, any time; when there's heart-to-heart communication, not just talking at each other, but listening actively and sensitively, caring deeply about the communication.” ~Doug Goins

Your attitude toward your husband’s sexuality and sex drive is important because you alone have the power to bless him sexually and affirm his male identity. Your responsiveness is a major component of how he feels about himself. Your husband needs to feel that when he initiates intimacy with you, you “welcome” him and want to “receive” him. By doing so, you affirm him—indeed, you affirm his leadership and initiative, the very essence of manhood.  ~ Rekindling the Romance: Loving the Love of Your Life by Dennis & Barbara Rainey

“By God’s faithful provision through marriage—your protection sleeps right next to you every night.” ~Dave Harvey

'By God’s faithful provision through marriage—your protection sleeps right next to you every night.' ~Dave Harvey Click to Tweet

“It is as important to be filled with the Spirit in bed with your husband, ministering to him, as it is for you to be filled with Spirit when you are teaching the Bible or ministering.” ~Vonette Bright

Reflecting on Solomon's Bride the Shulammite Woman:

She is responsive sexually to her husband, she is adventurous in her lovemaking – she receives sexual pleasure from her husband, and she is the initiator. She has them making love outdoors! She is uninhibited with her lover and guides him as to where to touch her. She is verbally expressive to him. And she is sensuous – she is a woman who is tuned into her body, and when Solomon isn’t there she is thinking about him in a sensuous way – her thoughts are on his physical appearance, and she is delighting in it as she in her mind undresses her husband from his head on down.

“Our sexual life is what our thoughts make it. Your mind is your greatest sexual organ. Use it to become the godly and sensuous lover God desires you to be.” ~ Intimate Issues

“You are the only legal God-blessed source of sexual fulfillment that your husband will ever have if he follows the Lord carefully. Give him the joy and pleasure that he can only experience with you.” ~ Jani Ortlund

'You are the only legal God-blessed source of sexual fulfillment that your husband will ever have if he follows the Lord carefully. Give him the joy and pleasure that he can only experience with you.' ~ Jani Ortlund Click to Tweet

Scriptures & Resources:

Proverbs 5:18-19

Genesis 2:24

Genesis 2:25

Genesis 3:16

Ephesians 5:31-32

Genesis 1:28

Genesis 4:1

Proverbs 15:5

1 Corinthians 7:2,5

2 Samuel 2:24

1 Corinthians 7:7-8

1 Corinthians 7:10-11

1 Corinthians 7:3-5

Matthew 16:25

Song of Solomon 4:1, 3, 5, 10-12

Psalm 26:1-3

Romans 12:19

Proverbs 11:21

2 Corinthians 5:17

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Philippians 4:8

Romans 11:36

Song of Solomon 5:1

Proverbs 5:19

Titus 2:4

Resources:

Thankful Homemaker on Instagram

Homemaking Ministries 2018 Online Conference – The Deep Dive Summit

Marriage Series at the Blog

My Favorite Resources on Sex and Sexual Intimacy in Marriage at Thankful Homemaker

The Excellent Wife: A Biblical Perspective by Martha Peace

Intended for Pleasure: Sex Technique and Sexual Fulfillment in Christian Marriage by Ed Wheat

Intimate Issues: 21 Questions Christian Women Ask About Sex by Linda Dillow and Lorraine Pintus

When Sinners Say I Do by Dave Harvey

Rekindling the Romance: Loving the Love of Your Life by Dennis & Barbara Rainey

A Celebration of Sex: A Guide to Enjoying God's Gift of Sexual Intimacy by Dr. Doug Rosenau

Strengthening Your Marriage by Wayne Mack

The Intimate Marriage: A Practical Guide to Building a Great Marriage by R. C. Sproul

My Abortion story & Why I Counsel at Abortuaries at Thankful Homemaker

The Devilish Puppet Master of the Word-Faith Movement sermon at Grace to You on False Prophets

Weekend to Remember from Family Life Today

Podcast Ep. 35: Marriage Series #2 – To Love Their Husbands at Thankful Homemaker

Podcast Ep. 17: What it Looks Like to Cherish Our Husbands at Thankful Homemaker

Listen & Download the Podcast:

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Find All Podcast Episodes with Show Notes

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Download this episode (right click and save)

Related posts:

  1. My Favorite Resources on Sex and Sexual Intimacy in Marriage
  2. EP 38: What Does Submission in Marriage Look Like? {Marriage Series}
  3. Podcast Ep 39: How to Communicate with Your Spouse – Marriage Series #6
  4. Podcast Ep 34: Marriage Series #1 – God’s Design for Our Marriages & Our Role as Women


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Marci Ferrell
Think to yourself before you respond to pause and Think to yourself before you respond to pause and pray. Two simple actions that take a moment but can give you wise words that are covered in gentleness, grace, and love.⁣
⁣
Quote from EP 60: Gently Correcting Our Children you can listen in at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
We are called in Ephesians 4:29 to respond with wo We are called in Ephesians 4:29 to respond with words that give grace, encourage, and build up. This includes those hard moments when our kids are sinfully disobedient.⁣
⁣
Listen in to EP 60: Gently Correcting Our Children at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
By affliction, Christ . . .⁣ shows us our empti By affliction, Christ . . .⁣
 shows us our emptiness and weakness,⁣
 draws us to the throne of grace,⁣
 purifies our affections,⁣
 weans us from the world,⁣
 and makes us long for Heaven.⁣
~ J.C Ryle
This simple free eight-page guide is meant to help This simple free eight-page guide is meant to help you think through your summertime schedule for your family. As you walk through it you'll determine what your family loves to do, leave room for spontaneity, and put together a simple daily routine to help your days run a bit smoother. ⁣
⁣
There are some summertime meal planning tips and a printable with ideas to put on your family's bucket list for summer and maybe spark new ones of your own! ⁣
⁣
Come download your free 8-page summertime guide here and get access to our whole library of printables when you do.
Such a good conversation with Dale Partridge from Such a good conversation with Dale Partridge from @relearnhq about his new Gospel Project called MailtheGospel.org. You can get the gospel to anyone anywhere.
So appreciate @reagantrose (I do recommend you fol So appreciate @reagantrose (I do recommend you follow friends if you don’t yet!)- link to the podcast episode we talked about Homemaking to the Glory of God in my profile @thankfulhomemaker 

Repost from @reagantrose 
Godliness > Your Plans⁠
The Church is not a gallery for the exhibition of The Church is not a gallery for the exhibition of eminent Christians, but a school for the education of imperfect ones.⁣
~ Henry Ward Beecher⁣
⁣
Come listen to EP 32: Preparing Our Families for Sunday Morning Worship at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
How many times does Sunday morning roll around and How many times does Sunday morning roll around and you find your heart in a state of chaos instead of calm to worship the Lord?  How many Sundays do you arrive at church and realize you haven’t taken the time all week to pray for your pastor or your church family? ⁣
⁣
I want to share with you some simple steps we can take to prepare our hearts and the hearts of our families for Sunday morning worship to the Lord. ⁣
⁣
The hope today is to get you to understand the purpose and the mission of the local church and then to move on toward how we can proceed with some simple steps to prepare our hearts and the hearts of our families for Sunday morning worship to the Lord.⁣
⁣
Come listen to EP 32: Preparing Our Families for Sunday Morning Worship at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
"Home is the true wife's kingdom. ⁣ ⁣ Very lar "Home is the true wife's kingdom. ⁣
⁣
Very largely does the wife hold in her ⁣
hands, as a sacred trust, the happiness ⁣
and the highest good of the hearts that ⁣
nestle there. In the last analysis, home ⁣
happiness depends on the wife. ⁣
⁣
Her spirit gives the home its atmosphere. ⁣
⁣
Her hands fashion its beauty. ⁣
⁣
Her heart makes its love. ⁣
⁣
And the end is so worthy, so noble, so divine, ⁣
that no woman who has been called to be a wife, ⁣
and has listened to the call, should consider any⁣
price too great to pay, to be . . .⁣
 the light,⁣
 the joy,⁣
 the blessing,⁣
 the inspiration, ⁣
of a home. ⁣
⁣
The woman who makes a sweet, beautiful home, ⁣
filling it with love and prayer and purity, is doing ⁣
something better than anything else her hands ⁣
could find to do beneath the skies.⁣
⁣
A true mother is one of the holiest secrets of ⁣
home happiness. God sends many beautiful things ⁣
to this world, many noble gifts; but no blessing is ⁣
richer than that which He bestows in a mother who ⁣
has learned love's lessons well, and has realized ⁣
something of the meaning of her sacred calling."⁣
⁣
~ J. R. Miller, "Secrets of Happy Home Life"
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