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She Opens Her Mouth With Wisdom

by Marci Ferrell
Biblical Womanhood Christian Living Communicating with Our Children Communication in Marriage Encouragement Loving Our Children Loving Our Husbands Motherhood Titus 2

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Speaking kindly to others outside our home is easy to do.  It is easy to put on a good face to others.  Our true hearts are revealed by the way we speak to those within our homes.

 

Speaking kindly to others outside our home is easy to do.  It is easy to put on a good face to others.  Our true hearts are revealed by the way we speak to those within our homes. #proverbs31 #speakingkindly #communicatingwithourchildren @mferrell

She opens her mouth with wisdom,
    and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
Proverbs 31:26

I have been spending time camping in Proverbs these past few weeks, and Proverbs 31 seems to get most of my time.  It is mindful to remember that Proverbs are not promises for our lives but guides to help us in living productive and successful lives according to God’s ways. Proverbs are a great place to get practical wisdom.

 

Speaking Words of Wisdom

As we just look at the verse above (Proverbs 31:26), it gives much to ponder for us as wives and mothers.  As I sat and observed the verse, one thing that stood out to me was when she opened her mouth, meaning she didn’t always open her mouth, she spoke with wisdom.

As a Christian woman who desires to speak words of wisdom, I again pondered what types of words would come out of her mouth.

I believe she would be careful in choosing her words.  They would be words that are in line with God’s Word and useful for others to hear.  To her children, her words would build up, encourage and correct.  They would speak of God’s goodness, his gift of salvation through Christ and be words that speak grace to their souls.

Out of her mouth would not come cursing, filthy language, slander or any other corrupt communication (Colossians 3:8, Ephesians 4:29).  In Ephesians 4:29 it says our words should be only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.

Kindness is on Her Tongue

Speaking kindly to others outside our home is easy to do.  It is easy to put on a good face to others.  Our true hearts are revealed by the way we speak to those within our homes.  The example before us in Proverbs 31 is when she speaks to give instruction; kindness is on her tongue.

Our true hearts are revealed by the way we speak to those within our homes. Click to Tweet

Search your heart Mama and let the Lord search your heart and do His work as this is an area that usually needs much attention in our lives.  Too many times our words to our children are sinful, and we can tend to overlook our sinful speech.  We need to treat and talk to our children the way we would desire them to treat and talk to us.  Who is setting the example here?

Our words should be gracious and gentle within and outside our homes.  Practice using “please” and “thank you” and “will you forgive me?”.  Take the time to pray before you respond to a difficult situation and talk to the Lord about it first.  You can still be firm with your children when needed and gentle at the same time.  

Speaking Words of Life

Matthew 12:34 reminds us that out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.  What is coming out of your heart?  Are they words that speak life to others?  One of the most important messages you can share with your children and those in your sphere of influence is the Gospel. There are no kinder words that can come from your mouth than those that bring eternal life.  

Our Lord did not leave us to fend for ourselves in this most difficult area of our lives.  We have His Word, and if we are in Christ, we have His Holy Spirit within us to tame our tongues.  We will never reach perfection in this area of our lives while we are here on this earth, but as we continue to fill our hearts with God’s Word and yield to the Holy Spirit He is faithful to continue to sanctify us and help us in this most difficult area of our lives to have victory over.

Our words should be a reflection that we are God’s children.  May we continue to value His Words above all else.

Some questions to ponder as you interact with your family and others:

  1. Where can you stop speaking words of destruction?  What relationship most needs that from you?  How are you going to remind yourself?
  2.  Where can you begin speaking words that create this week? Who most needs you to speak encouragement to them?

(above two questions taken from Jen Wilkin’s study on James, Week 7)

15 And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. 16 Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. 17 And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

Colossians 3:15-17

 

Related Links:

Podcast: Putting on Kindness in Our Homes

The Law of Kindness

Are You Kind to Your Husband?

Kindness in Our Homes

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Related posts:

  1. EP 18: Putting on an Attitude of Love in Our Homes
  2. Putting on an Attitude of Love in Your Home
  3. Serving the Lord in Our Mundane Moments
  4. Podcast EP 58: A Letter to My Younger Self


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Comments

  1. Janie says

    at

    I think you speak with much wisdom on this site! I am grateful to have found it! I enjoy both your writings and the links to what you are pondering during the week! Thank you for writing!

    • Marci Ferrell says

      at

      Thank you Janie – so glad you’re here!

  2. Tracey says

    at

    This is one of my favorite verses about the Proverbs 31 woman ~ perhaps it’s because it’s an area where I know I struggle often. How I want to be characterized by speaking kind words!! Asking God for His help to speak wise and kind words to my family today, as well as to others outside of my home.

    • Marci Ferrell says

      at

      Praying for both of us on this one Tracey xo

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Marci Ferrell
It is better to get wisdom than gold. Gold is anot It is better to get wisdom than gold. Gold is another’s, wisdom is our own; gold is for the body and time, wisdom for the soul and eternity.⁣
~ Matthew Henry⁣
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Read Seeking Whatever is Good at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
Whether you're running errands, doing household ch Whether you're running errands, doing household chores, or sipping your coffee, you can do it in style, reminding yourself and others you are a Thankful Homemaker 🥰⁣
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Shop TH Gear at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image).
What do you think of when you hear the word discer What do you think of when you hear the word discernment? The dictionary defines it as making a distinction between good and evil and truth and falsehood. As believers, we all desire to be discerning and wise in our choices. As we mature and grow in our knowledge of the scriptures, the hope is we will use that information to make choices in line with God's will.⁣
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We become discerning people by not just knowing what to think but how to think. Being spiritually discerning is an ability to see the world the way God does. This comes about as we grow and mature spiritually into the likeness of Christ. It is about seeing “All That's Good.”⁣
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Read Seeking Whatever is Good at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
“Waiting exposes our idols and throws a wrench i “Waiting exposes our idols and throws a wrench into our coping mechanisms. It brings us to the end of what we can control and forces us to cry out to God. God doesn’t waste our waiting. He uses it to conform us to the image of his Son.”⁣
~ Betsy Childs Howard⁣
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Listen in to EP 23: Seasons of Waiting at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
As I’m sharing this episode, I’m finding mysel As I’m sharing this episode, I’m finding myself in a waiting room on the Lord, and it’s been a long one, and I don’t see an end near.  It has reminded me that when I gave myself to Him, I gave up my “right” to be in charge. The reality is we never were in charge anyway; we just came to that understanding when the Lord opened our eyes to His sovereign control over our lives.⁣
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Even though it is a truth I know or we know, how many times do we want to think that somehow we can effect change in our life situations?⁣
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Waiting is hard because there is no guarantee that my waiting will end in this lifetime. One thing I have learned – my waiting has deepened my trust in the Lord and has helped me to develop patience, perseverance, and endurance.⁣
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It’s also given me different eyes to see with compassion others who are in a season of waiting.⁣
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Listen in to EP 23 Seasons of Waiting at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
Six questions I have written in my Bible that have Six questions I have written in my Bible that have been a help to me over the years may be a help to you, too, to be prayerful and slow to speak. These are helpful questions not just in our friendships but in our marriages and with our children, and truly any of our relationships:⁣
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1. Is this the time to say this?⁣
2. Am I the person to say this?⁣
3. Is it necessary?⁣
4. Is it true?⁣
5. Is it kind?⁣
6. Do I need to say this?⁣
⁣
Listen in to EP 140: Threats to Biblical Friendship at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
We all know that fostering true biblical friendshi We all know that fostering true biblical friendship isn’t easy – it takes work. Jesus told us in John 16:33 that we’re going to have trouble in this world, and trouble does touch all our lives in various areas, but this includes our friendships too.⁣
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We’ll be hurt; we’ll be the ones hurting others; selfishness is a battle; jealousy and envy raise their ugly heads; we have our fears and insecurities, failed expectations, the damage our tongues do to one another, not appropriating the gospel and these all come from hearts that are still battling sin. ⁣
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So when these threats to our friendship with one another in Christ come up, it shouldn’t surprise us that we have these issues, but what we need to keep at the forefront of our minds is how we respond and deal with them when they do come up. ⁣
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I want to walk us through some of these threats, and this list I’m working with isn’t exhaustive – there are many more threats than what I am addressing today – but these are areas that stood out to me that have been a battle within some of my friendships over the years. Sadly, it is often the sin I’m battling in my heart, and I need to get my thinking, attitudes, and actions lined up with God’s Word.⁣
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Listen to EP 140 Threats to Biblical Friendship at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
May we be women who are willing to return to the a May we be women who are willing to return to the authority of God’s Word, embrace God’s priorities for our lives and homes, and live out the beauty and wonder of womanhood as God created it to be.⁣
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Read more at The History of Modern Feminism at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
Women will never find fulfillment and satisfaction Women will never find fulfillment and satisfaction by trying to be "like" men and shedding their uniqueness as a female.  They will only find satisfaction in Christ.⁣
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Come read The History of Modern Feminism at the link in my profile @thankfulhomemaker (click on the link under the blue arrows and then this image)
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